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Udurawana's SWOT analysis 1. Strength : My wife. 2. Weakness : My neighbor's wife. 3. Opportunity : When My neighbor is on tour. 4. Threat : When I am on tour Who is the boss ?? Udurawana was tired of being bossed around by his wife; so he went to a psychiatrist. The psychiatrist said he needed to build his self-esteem, and so gave him a book on assertiveness, which he read on the way home. He had finished the book by the time he reached his house. Udurawana stormed into the house and walked up to his wife. Pointing a finger in her face, he said, 'From now on, I want you to know that *I* am the man of this house, and my word is law! I want you to prepare me a gourmet meal tonight, and when I'm finished eating my meal, I expect a sumptuous dessert afterward. Then, after dinner, you're going to draw me my bath so I can relax. And when I'm finished with my bath, guess who's going to dress me and comb my hair ....' 'The funeral director,' said his wife. Flute Udurawana : Hey man ! why did you give this useless flute to my son ? Shopkeeper : What happened, sir ? Udurawana : what happened ? this flute is full of holes....!!! ! Hearing Udurawana had serious hearing problems for a number of years. He went to the doctor and the doctor was able to have him fitted for a set of hearing aids that allowed him to hear 100%. He went back in a month to the doctor and the doctor said, 'Your hearing is perfect. Your family must be really pleased that you can hear again.' Udurawana replied, 'Oh, I haven't told my family yet. I just sit around and listen to the conversations. I've changed my will three times!' Communication Udurawan & his friend tired of mobile & decide to use pigeons. One day a pigeon reaches Udurawana without message. Angry Udurawana calls his friend & asks ' Is this a miss call ???????????? ' Mother tongue. Son(while filling up a form) : Dad, what should I write against mother tongue.? Udurawana : Very long! Door bell A lady calls Udurawana for repairing door bell. Udurawana doesn't turns up for 4 days. Lady calls again. Udurawana replies: I came 4 days, pressed the bell, but no one came out. Lost key Udurawana : I have swallowed a key. Doctor: When? Udurawana : 3 months back! Doctor: What were you doing till now? Udurawana : I was using duplicate key, now I have lost it too Name of dogs Udurawana who had acquired two new dogs, was visiting his friend, and the friend asked what their names were. Udurawana responded by saying that one was named 'Rolex' and one was named 'Gemex'. His friend said, 'Whoever heard of someone naming dogs like that?' 'They're watch dogs!' answered Udurawana. The act of unlocking A customer arrived at an automobile dealership to pick up their car, They were told that the keys had been accidentally locked in it. He went to the service department and found the mechanic Udurawana. Udurawana working feverishly to unlock the driver's side door. As the customer watched from the passenger's side, he instinctively tried the door handle and discovered it was open. 'Hey,' he announced to the technician, 'It`s open!' 'I know,' answered Udurawana. 'I already got that side.. Now I am trying to open driver's side ' Well prepared Mrs Udurawana phoned Udurawana in the office and said: 'Darling, come home early, we are going to have my mother for dinner.' 'Good' replied Udurawana, 'make sure she's prepared well'. |
25/12/2011 16:16 |
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lol | 25/12/2011 16:18 |
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i love it man couldnt control my laughter...they are gr8 and please keep posting |
26/12/2011 18:14 |
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RIOT! | 27/12/2011 05:11 |
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